This one conversation I had… #3 of NaPoMo

Why the hell is my alarm going off so early
Ugh
It’ll stop
Wait
Is that my phone RINGING
Who the hell….
It’s like 4 in the morning….

So I get up
Determined not to be reactionary
Trying to shift my energy from Annoyed to Awake…. Barely
And with my voice still groggy
I answer

Hello?

What u doing Ray Ray?

Now any other day
that would’ve been the beautiful soundtrack to start my day
cause only my dear hearts call me Ray Ray
But instead of Sunshine… I was already prepared to have a bad day
Because Mr. I Used to LoveHer has me awake before the Sun
With nothing more pressing than a cliche greeting of nothingness
And I’m supposed to respond to this
without anger
without disappointment of the selfishness that birthed this moment
no hostility
I was supposed to NOT be reactionary

So my answer was…

Sleeping. Good day.

And I hung up the phone with the pride of knowing I had given it a shot
I hadn’t been as nice as I’d wished to be
But I wasn’t completely reactionary
Cause while I can’t control when Mr. I Used to LoveHer pops up
or any of the World’s other annoying offspring or circumstances…
I can control how I respond.

I chose to use the poetry of Silence.

And then I turned that damn ringer OFF.

~LaRay~

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2 thoughts on “This one conversation I had… #3 of NaPoMo

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